'Braided Breasts & Unbuttoning hands' is a collection of poetry about releasing the moments of word vomit I have felt at a particular time. Exploring love, loss, being lost and losing people but gaining yourself. (wrote between March-August 2017)
And now I have said all that I wish, Up until this point of course.
Live in my heart if you want to.
This year, has to say the least been a tough one. Being the last year of university, last year living in London (without a job anyhow) and a major parting of ways a range of extreme emotions has been felt.
Going back home was a tough one, London had been my escape in the first place, but I needed to return to somewhere to find out what I truly wanted. Going straight into a full time job in London just to pay rent on a crappy place didn't look like a good option at that time. From going to Europe solo, it fully energised me to create and led me to focus on travel and pursing other options, rather than attempting to go straight into a design/creative career. I want to experience true freedom while retaining the safety blanket of mummy house.
11 weeks after my trip I have finally completed my poetry book. Wrote on the brink of heart ache from everything ending at once, it was something that in a way glued me back together. Publications are not something I wish to do a lot or specialise in, but for this purpose it was perfect. I really enjoyed the detailing of compositions and layouts, choosing type and fully being in creative control. Its a object I have completely created from scratch, and it feels great.
For the publication I probably made 200 illustrations. I didn't set out for what I created to be for the book, but somehow there was a illustration which aligned to a poem. My subconscious being on top marks this time.
I am really proud of what I made and it became a sort of therapy, re-reading over and over my poetry to check if everything was okay made me come to terms with how I felt and able to let go. it also gave me a insight into myself. For the amount of time you spend reading a poem, I have most likely already wrote it. Not paying much attention to when I write them at the time, its almost word vomit. Which I specify at the back of the book.
I began this project in June, so to see a conclusion is weird. Not only a conclusion to the project but how I felt to a particular ending.
The book covers 3 sections; You, Them, Me. New to writing poetry its most likely you write about what you know, I wrote about who I care for and how I feel toward them. Whether this loving, hatful, frustration, suffocated or caring. Looking back I can't really relate to many of what I wrote, time seems to have done a good job at helping me go forward, this book is a visual representation of that, which will be interesting to look at in the future.
For the publication, I didn't want it to be a standard poetry book, where its either full text, or just hints of Illustration. Take for instance 'Milk and Honey' by Rupi Kaur, the poems are powerful and the illustrations intertwine in a minimal essence, not to overpower or distract from the raw emotion in the almost lyrical poems. Being a visual person I wanted my pieces to work as one, while also retaining there own space. The imagery is often an abstracted essence of what the poem is speaking, but you could get to that place from your own conclusions after reading the poem.
Whether you read poetry or not, I think this is still a worthy book, being proud of the images they stand on their own just as much as the poetry.